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PONDERINGS FROM THE ETERNAL NOW

July 2004 - #12

Dear Friends,

According to Ron Rolheiser , a modern day spiritual writer, “to ponder is to take into oneself tensions, to hold it and to give it back transformed.”

These past months I've been pondering deeply what it means to “love your neighbor.” I'm finding this more difficult than to “love your enemy.”

Every Saturday evening at our Episcopal Mass, Chaplin Elizabeth Walker closes with this blessing:

May the Lord Jesus Christ who walks on wounded feet
Walk with you to the end of the road.
May the Lord Jesus Christ who loves with a wounded heart
Help you to love your neighbor and one another.
May the Lord Jesus Christ who serves with wounded hands
Help you to serve each other and your neighbors.
May you see the face of God on everyone you meet,
And may the blessing of God Almighty,
The Father, Son, and Holy Spirit
Be with you this day and remain with you always.
Amen.

The obscene language, loud talking, yelling, constant messy sinks and toilets, cutting in lines, unhealthy relationships, inconsiderate and immature women, etc., etc., begin to take its toll.

My belief is that “class” determines how difficult or easy it is for me to “love my neighbor” these days rather than race or culture, unless the culture believes in quiet, order and responsibility.

If it's true that every thought, word and deed ripples through our universe than I must confess we are far from a nonviolent world if my life is typical.

And so, I pray many times a day to live more nonviolently, to see the face of God in everyone I meet and to be transformed.

_________________

 

Lest you think your tax dollars are not wisely at work:

I was awakened at 2:00 a.m. on a week day to get dressed and go with the guard to the Administration Building for a drug/urine test and breathalyzer.

As we rode the ¼ mile I told her we had a problem as I had just emptied by bladder at 1:30 a.m. and was back in a deep sleep.

She informed me I had two hours to produce or be sent to Beckley County Jail.

I sat on a wooden bench for 45 minutes when she took me to the bathroom and ran the faucets. Nothing!

I returned to the bench where she told me she had to leave and do 3:00 a.m. count. She gave me two 6 oz glasses of water and told me she would be back in an hour.

The lieutenant was very kind and brought me a soft chair to sit in.

At 4:00 a.m. the guard returned and we tried again. A dribble! She said it must come up to the line. It comes. I sign the paper work. The container is placed in a plastic bag and sent off for testing. I am back in my bed at 4:30 a.m.

When I asked her why they wake us up in the middle of the night, she tells me that every shift has to do so many tests and it is all random – the computer spews out the names.

When I asked about wasted costs and if they ever find anything, she tells me that this is BOP policy.

If you get a chance try to watch the film, “The Big House – Alderson.” It was filmed in 1998 and produced for PBS, the History Channel. It is well done and features our Nukewatch peacemaker, Bonnie Urfer .

We survived a 28-hour water shut off as the city of Alderson did some water repair work – something to do with bacteria.

We also survived a 24-hour period with no guards. All the correctional officers went on a retreat and we were left with the secretaries/medical staff counting us. Why don't they just send us all home?

 

Some nature observations have included:

•  Spider webs high in the branches of very old maple and oak tress with dew glistening in the sun
•  Cows from a nearby farm escaping to our property
•  Watching a rabbit eat our flower tops
•  A red tailed deer eating apples almost out of our hands
•  A glimpse of a yellow warbler and an indigo bunting
•  Robins , starlings, sparrows and finches teaching their babies to eat
•  Squirrels eating bananas which are healthier than Jolly Ranchers (hard candy)

The irony is that while many people are afraid of us “convicts” the animals are not afraid. The birds and squirrels don't move as we pass. We don't disturb them in any way. It is really quite amazing.

The gardens are planted and growing. It is truly a miracle to see these plants coming through the clay, cracked ground.

We are allowed to eat our veggies but many get “stolen” by both humans and non-humans so we shall see.

How many ways can I say thank you for your prayers, letters, article, books, support and love? My heart overflows with gratitude.

I'll close with a quote from priest, writer and friend, John Dear , S.J. :

The life of peace is both an inner journey
toward a disarmed heart and a public journey
toward a disarmed world.

These days that inner journey is most difficult as I strive for a disarmed heart. Blessing on your inner and public journey!

 

Deep love,
Carol

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